Early to bed, early to rise

On Monday nights before Joe's appointments, that saying is quite accurate.  Joe was up at 5:50 am this morning and I followed soon thereafter. We arrived at 7:15am at the  Duke Clinic for his 7:30 labs.  We split at the first floor stairs, me heading for coffee and Joe's lemonade and him to check in.  At 7:40am he was called for his blood work and now we wait for the doctor.  But the real question of the day, whose picture will I take without their knowledge and post?

Dare I say it?  Maybe we are going for another record.  It's 8:00 am and Joe has already had his vitals and we are back in an exam room.   Maybe this week I'll be less than an hour late for work.  Maybe it's because there apparently are not many early appointments as is evident by the nearly empty waiting room pictured here.  

Guess the few here were the lucky photo op people. Regardless, it's fine with me to get it over with quickly, as I'm sure it is with Joe.

While waiting, I’ll digress:  We had a very quiet weekend even though I mowed the front yard on Saturday and the back on Sunday.  It's so much easier and much less of a hassle to split it up.  Thank goodness for a fenced backyard since I can let that go a little longer than I should without our neighbors having to look at it.  The rest of the weekend consisted of me and Joe laying around on the couch watching shows that were DVR'd for the last 2 weeks (with me sleeping through much of it).  Speaking of which, I need some opinions, is it fair to take a picture of a person asleep on the sofa without his knowledge when he is not very well dressed and looks like something out of Lord of the Rings?  I personally don't think so especially when said photo is VERY unflattering.  I would post it but I have to retain some degree of dignity.  Sunday was typical with church arrival at 7:30 am then off to McDonalds for breakfast between the early and late services and then back for the 11:00am service.  Afterwards out for lunch (thanks for the coupon Allana), a brief stop at two Home Goods stores then home for the rest of the day.  As soon as The Good Wife was over we were off to bed so we could make the early arrival which brings us back to now.  All in all, a very good weekend with some much needed rest for both of us.

But back to the appointment.  Princess Leigh (Mark gave her that name, not me or Joe) was back in the exam room around 8:30am and we were out at the check out/appointment  desk by 8:45.  I dropped Joe off at the infusion center 5 minutes later and I was on my way to the office.  Joe met me for lunch in the afternoon and then accompanied the Durham Children’s Chorus Training Choir later this afternoon.  Tonight he says he is tired and has a bit of a scratchy throat.  He’s going to have to take some aspirin (along with all his other pills) and make it an early night.  Best thing is that this is the end of a cycle so he doesn’t have another treatment until November 7. YAY!

It Pays to Pay Attention to Dates

It pays to pay attention to dates especially when scheduling doctors appointments.  It seems every week or two we learn a new lesson.  This week it was to pay attention to the dates when scheduling appointments and paying for them online ahead of time.  We arrived for Joe's 7:30am appointment at Duke at 7:15am.  Joe went on to the clinic while I veered off to the food court for his large lemonade and my coffee.  Upon joining him at the clinic, he told me that apparently there was some mix up and they did not have him scheduled for an appointment at all.  No doctors appointment, no lab work, no chemo. Oh great!  But before I freaked out, Joe said they were working on trying to figure out the mistake and get him scheduled.  Before too long, about 20 mins, Adam the miracle worker at check-in/check-out, came over with a buzzer for Joe and told him that all 3 appointments were set up. Another 15 minutes and his blood had been drawn and sent off to the lab and about 10 minutes after that we were in an exam room where the nurse greeted us a few minutes later.  After that Joe was off to the chemo infusion center and I was off to work.  This all done by 8:55am.  By 10:40am Joe called me and he was already done with chemo and on his way home. Those of you that are regular readers know that it's more than just rare for him to be done with everything before 11am.  One might say it practically never happens.  Ok, I'll say it, IT NEVER HAPPENS!  So what is the moral, don't make appointments and just show up?  Dare we?  I say go for it, but I don't think I've quite convinced Joe to get on board.  But someone explain it to me.  Have an appointment, out around noon or after.  No appointment and out before 11am.  I know, there is no explanation.  I'm just glad that today didn't end up a disaster with Joe having to spend a long, unnecessary amount of time there.  As it turns out it was just a clerical error that we didn't catch, not even when I checked him in online Sunday night.  I just went to the next appointment on the list and checked him in, not noticing that the date was the 24th, not the 17th.  Oh well, except for a few minutes spent wondering what would happen, no harm, no foul.

The rest of the day has been a good one for Joe. He went to Costco (a favorite of his) came and met me for lunch, followed by a trip to Trader Joe's (another one of his favorites) , and then his regular Monday rehearsal as accompanist with the training choir for the Durham Childrens Chorus.  He has been enjoying watching and listening to the young kids.  Prior to leaving for the rehearsal he pulled out the old bread maker and started some Spice Apple bread baking.  You would not believe how good the house smelled when I got home.  Mouth watering!!!!   

Joe is home now from his rehearsal and dinner will be ready soon.  After dinner we will settle down to watch some TV and then off to bed early and hopefully Joe won't have too difficult of a night as has become more the norm on chemo nights.  On the up side of his not being able to sleep well on Monday nights, I've often come down on Tuesday morning to see the kitchen and family room VERY clean!  (I try to look on the bright side - - glass half full rather than half empty)

As always, we want to thank everyone for their thoughts and prayers and this week I would like to ask everyone to also please remember Mary & Bob Anderson from PGUMC.  Mary had surgery last Thursday at UNC.  We went and visited her on Sunday and although she looked and sounded great, please include her and Bob in your prayers and that she is out of the hospital and home soon.  She is more concerned about Bob while she is in the hospital than she is about herself.  I hope they are both back at church very soon as I miss talking with both of them as they are 2 of my favorite people.

So Sorry for the Delay

I do apologize for the delay in reporting in on Joe's Monday doctor and Chemo appointments at Duke. There were a couple of snags that day starting with the express self check in system. Joe scanned his barcode in around 7:15 for his 7:30 a.m. appointment. However, by 8:00 a.m. they still had not come and given him his buzzer so he went up to the desk and checked and of course they did not show him as checking in. They went ahead and gave him his buzzer and it wasn't long before it went off and he had his blood drawn for his labs. Then we waited in the waiting room for about another 20 minutes before they called us back into an exam room. Mark his nurse came in first and then Leigh Howard the NP came in for the exam. This was also the last in a three series of appointments that were recorded. Joe had agreed to the study a couple of months ago. It is amazing how aware you can be when there is a little recorder sitting there on the desk. I tried to be on my best behavior but when Leigh commented that Joe hadn't had a chance to get a word in, I shut up! Well, not really, but I did stop talking for a couple of minutes and during that time Joe still didn't talk much. It was very much like our early appointments where Joe never spoke. But anyway, there were no problems, he is maintaining his weight and his labs were as normal or abnormal as usual so after leaving the exam room he was off to the Chemo infusion center on the 2nd floor and I was off to work. By the time I got to the office, he was texting me that he was in a chair in the treatment area already. So except for the "bump" at the beginning and me apparently talking too much all went smoothly. Two more treatments to go in this cycle and then a week off as usual.

What Can You Say When Nothing "Eventful" Happens

This week has been one of those "uneventful" weeks that I like so much.  No doctors appointments at Duke, Joe has felt good all week, no trauma or drama, just a nice ordinary week doing ordinary things, going about ordinary lives.   The only problem with that is that there is nothing to report on the Blog and when I don't post, I get in trouble with some folks for not updating them.  So here goes:
Monday- No doctor appointment so Joe got to sleep in later.  Lawn people came and aerated and overseeded the lawn.   Joe had rehearsal with the Durham County Childrens Chorus in the late afternoon so I watered the lawn when I got home.
Tuesday- Joe had staff meeting at Pleasant Grove United Methodist Church (PGUMC) followed by working on getting his music ready for Sunday.  A couple of piano students in the afternoon, watering the lawn and TGMC practice Tuesday night.
Wednesday- A piano student, back at PGUMC working on his Sunday music, lunch with friends followed by watering the lawn and rehearsal that night with the choir.
Thursday- A series of complaining phone calls to me over his defective laptop, watering the lawn, a couple of piano students and then Disciple Bible Study at PGUMC Thursday night.
Friday- (today) Hopefully he has watered the lawn, then a piano student this afternoon and then finally a night at home.

Tomorrow, Joe will take Dolly over to PGUMC for the Blessing of the Animals while I get my flu shot.  After that we are off to Hope Mills to the Holland Family Reunion.  First one in many many years so hopefully there will be a decent turn out.  As long as the food is good and I know/recognize a few people, then we should be ok.

But see, nothing to report of any importance. Not that I am complaining, but I have to post something to keep others from complaining.

Thank you to everyone for their continued prayers and good thoughts for Joe.  We are both extremely appreciative.

It's Been a Good Saturday

It's been quite a productive day.  Lawn mowed and edged and Joe got a lot of shows on the DVR watched so we should be good for next week with no worries of it filling up and loosing shows (we were over 75% full before the day started).  Joe has spent most of the day lounging or laying around so he shouldn't be complaining this weekend about not getting enough rest.  Also, with no chemo this week, his sleep schedule should be more consistent.  All in all, it's been a good Saturday, together.

Interpretations of Biblical Scripture Misused to Promote Bigotry

Although the intention of this website is to keep people informed with Joe’s health with regard to his pancreatic cancer, I also feel it is incumbent upon me to also keep those that care for Joe up to date on other aspects of his well-being.  I mention this only because there was one night this week, Monday evening September 26^th,  that due to circumstances, was very hard on him emotionally and therefore affected him in many ways, including physically.  It was evident on Tuesday that the events of the previous evening were weighing heavily on him, some of that due to the fact that he did not sleep well the night before both due to his chemo treatment earlier in the day and with a lot on his mind that night at bedtime.

Earlier in the day, Joe had shared an article on Facebook from Barry Saunders that had appeared in the News & Observer.  The article was in regard to last weekend’s NC Pride Parade and festivities that had been held in Durham and Duke’s East Campus.  Both Joe and I had attended, Joe performing with the TGMC, along with many of our friends and acquaintances.  The essence of the Barry Saunders article was that he didn’t understand what the conservative, right leaning, politicians and populace of North Carolina were so afraid of when it came to gay people.  As he put it in the opening sentence of the article, “I went to the Gay Pride parade and guess what, I still like women.  So what are all of ya’ll afraid of?”  The article was in response to the Amendment One that will appear on the May 2012 Ballot to “Ban Gay Marriage and Define a Marriage as between One Man and One Woman”.  The proposed question in the opening sentence appeared on Joe’s Facebook “Wall” along with a link to the article.  I do not know if the persons that then decided it was their place to give an opinion read the article or just read the 1^st sentence that appeared on the post.  However, when I opened my Facebook page just before shutting my computer down at work and saw the first comment, coming from a childhood friend that Joe considered a friend in both real life and Facebook, I took it as a personal attack on Joe and did not react well to it.  My response to this person, although not ugly, was not kind and some may say mean spirited, but I accept that.  It is hard for me to sit back calmly when I feel someone is attacking him.  Some might say I am “over protective”, but I can live with that label as well.

Here is the first comment (I have removed the name and only have initials):

MW:  perhaps they are concerned about the continued spread of aids, the moral corruption of their children, the further moral decline of society, and promotion of a reprobate sin, which will surely bring more of God's judgment upon us.

My first response was:

Jeff Holland Perhaps Mr. W you should practice the form of Christianity that believes in loving thy fellow man along with caring and forgiveness rather than judging, which if I'm not mistaken, is clearly stated in the Bible. Oh, wait, I was thinking of Christian values.

What followed was a series of Bible thumping from him and then another childhood friend of Joe’s joined in and then a former middle school student of Joe’s joined in.  What ensued were hours of a hell fire and damnation diatribe from Mr. W, Mr. F and Mr. S.

Here is just a sample, but let me warn you, some of it is quite ugly with respect to the way Mr. W interprets the Bible, at least as far as we were concerned.

MW:  Mr Holland, Jesus Christ preached against sin much harder than I ever have, and warned about hell more than He promoted heaven. I judge no one, God's word has already performed that task. And when one truly loves, he is more than willing to take the heat for calling sin --- sin. What kind of love refuses to call to someone's attention to the fact they are about to jump off a cliff and find themselves in a bottomless pit? What kind of a loving parent would refuse to warn their child not to run out in the street? What kind of parent would not try to save a child who dares to run out into the street. The problem with most folk today, they do not understand true love -- they define love as lust.

MW : And may I add, any movement or church that condones the sin of homosexuality, which claims to be Christian is defined by the Bible as apostate, false, dead in sin, and reprobate. I love you, but I detest your sin. And the love of God would say, repent of your sin, receive the One True Christ, be justified, sanctified, and transformed into a "new creature in Christ." That's would be defined as true biblical love -- that which is willing to tell you the truth. By the way, I was brought up with Joe in the Baptist church, but I will not compromise with the Word of God and waywardness. I pray God the Holy Spirit convict, convince, and illuminate your mind to the truth of His Word, lest you become an eternal reprobate.

Jeff Holland : Mr W, let's agree to disagree. Having been brought up in the Baptist Church I heard more than enough of the type of speeches you give. As an adult I made my decision to remove myself from the hate speech and seek out God's love in a different environment, one that is accepting of the fact that all people are not the same, but that all people are due the same basic human rights. Continue your hell fire and damnation diatribes against any that disagree with your personal as well as religious points of view. Although you say you judge no one, your original response to Joe's posting about " continued spread of aids, moral corruption, moral decline of society and promotion of reprobate sin" seems judgmental to me. Possibly you should have been a psychoanalyst, since you seem to be able to diagnose "most folk" without having met "most folk". Maybe next time, you will wait to be asked for your opinion to one of Joe's posts before spouting off.

MW:  God has blessed you with the free will to choose and whatever lifestyle you choose to live is up to you -- just don't expect those of us who love God and believe the Bible to approve of your sin and don't seek to ask us to help you justify. Sleep with who you will, have as much sex as you like, (heterosexual or homosexual); but mark this down in red -- judgment day will come on all sin, including the sin of homosexuality, according to God -- not this preacher. Yes, God is loving and merciful when we choose His way (i spent 10 years as a drunk and addict before God cleaned me up). When we reject His way -- we reject love, grace and mercy --- leaving us with wrath and judgment.

RS: ‎1st Corinthians Chapter 6 verse nine KJV

MW:  that verse is very, very clear RS - and it's not just a Baptist Bible, it applies to all

Jeff Holland  Sir, I have not asked for your approval, nor do I desire it. I have put my life and faith in Jesus Christ and only desire judgment from him.

MW:  I am glad to hear you have put your life and faith in Jesus Christ. If that is truly the case, God has now given you the power to forsake and overcome the sin of homosexuality. Paul referred to this as "putting off the old self...corrupted ...,with the lusts of deceiit..." and put on the new man created in righteousness and holiness of the truth." Ephesians 4:22-24 Paul said, "if any man be in Christ, he is a New Creature, old things have passed away." Forsake you sin and become the witness and testimony that Christ has called you to be. "He who loves Me, will keep my commandments."

MW: ‎1 Corinthians 6:11 goes on to say --- "and such (homosexuals verse 9) WERE some of you." If you have truly put your fatih and trust in Christ, Paul says you "WERE" but are no longer a homosexual. That being the case, you now need to repent and forsake that sin, so you can start living a life of righteousness and holiness. In my case, I was once a drunk, I was a drug addict, I was a fornicator, an adulterer, but thank God, today I am a new creature and no longer have to live that way. I am free from the BONDAGE of sin. I am now "washed, justified, and sanctified." My sanctification is continually compelling me to put away the sins of the flesh.

Jeff Holland Mr. W  and Mr. S : As with most Christian faiths, except Southern Baptists and a few other Evangelical churches, the KJV hasn't been used for many years due to the vast quantity of translation errors discovered by Biblical scholars, therefore, I would have to disagree with YOUR interpretation of 1 Cor 6:9-11. In my Bible (the NRSV), homosexuals are never mentioned. As for Eph 4:22-24 it states, "You were taught to put away your former way of life, your old self, corrupt and deluded by its lusts, and to be renewed in the spirit of your minds, and to clothe yourselves with the new self, created according to the likeness of God in true righteousness and holiness". That sirs, I have done. But please, as I stated earlier, I have neither asked for nor desire your approval, therefore, this discussion is over for me. Have a nice day.

Of course it did not end there.  Especially once the other former childhood friend put his 2 cents worth in:

MF:  Jeff Holland, you are one prejudiced bastard.

As you can see, the type of comments deteriorated.  Joe finally posted a response expressing his sadness that 2 childhood friends and a former student would feel the need to condemn the 2 of us so profoundly and in such a public way.  He asked  all of them to please stop and to consider his response the last communication between them. 

Joe Lupton:  MW, yes we were friends when we were young and growing up in Roanoke Baptist Church and I thought we could continue as FB friends; however, I have never made any condemning and bigoted statements on anyone's FB page. Yes, people can disagree; however, the venom that spills out of your mouth does NOT reflect the God that I have loved and served throughout my life. "To love another person is to see the face of God" is from Les Miz & I wish more could abide by this instead of forcing such condemning views upon all of the world.  In my dealings with pancreatic cancer I have come to put all of my energy into loving the world and praying for all to have love in their hearts. I feel that my life right now needs positive influences and not such negativity as you present. Please consider this our last communication. (MF, I don't appreciate your "liking" on MW’s post even if you do agree with him. RS, when you were a student of mine, I tried to treat everyone equally and tried never to condemn anyone. I had hoped that you had learned something from me.

Of course that didn’t happen as all of them continued on for hours.  Joe has since removed the entire exchange from his Facebook wall.

On a happier note, many of our friends did chime in showing support for us and expressing their opinion on the posts from MW, RS and MF.  Many, many, many thanks to Mark Potratz, Stacy Potratz, Amos Brown, Chelsea Brown, Challie Sullivan and Lola Elliott Hugh for their support that night.  At some point, Joe intends to post the entire conversation as a Note on his Facebook wall just to show the type of hate speech and condemnation that we deal with continually, especially with the proposed Amendment One to the Constitution of North Carolina coming up on the May ballot.  We are hopeful that level headed and intelligent people from all sides, liberal, conservative, progressive, right-wing and left-wing can see how divisive and detrimental passage of this Amendment One will be to the entire State of North Carolina.

Today Joe is feeling better about things as the events of Monday become more distant but I know that it will be a long time before that night is forgotten by either of us.

End of Chemo Cycle #.???????...Oh I've Lost Count!

This morning was the last in a 3 week Chemo cycle at Duke for Joe.  I've lost count as to which cycle this is, not that it really matters.  We were a little concerned from last week that he might not get to have his chemo treatment this week because one of his blood counts was low.  He had been warned last week to avoid anyone with sniffles, coughs or sneezing since the low count indicated he could very easily pick up something and his immune system would find it difficult to fight off.  Had the count been any lower today he wouldn't be able to have his treatment.  However, the count was the same, no better, no worse so he was allowed to go on for his treatment. 

He did get the idea last week that wearing the same clothes each week was not a good idea and this week surprised me by wearing something different and crossing his legs differently.  I guess you can teach an old dog new tricks.



He also got his Flu shot.  As you can tell by the look on his face, he is a really big baby when it comes to shots (of course, I am worse, so I have no room to talk).  Mark Bradford, his nurse, was extremely considerate and got the smallest needle he could find to give him the shot.  I guess it wasn't small enough judging by Joe's closed eyes.



But anyway, once Mark was through we left for the chemo infusion center where we parted ways and I came on to work.  Joe was finished with his treatment by 10:45am and on his way home.  Now he will have a week off, hopefully behave himself so there are no fevers and we won't be back until October 10th.

Hope everyone has a great week and thanks for your continued prayers and support.  

It was a Good Week for Joe

YAY!  We were back to a more normal schedule this week and Joe had no fevers or bad days!  His schedule this week was reasonably normal (as far as normal goes for him) with doctor's appointment & chemo the first of the week, chorus practice on Tuesday, choir practice on Wednesday, Bible study on Thursday and various piano students throughout.   All that and rain off and on for several days make for a good week.  Joe is currently getting ready for the chorus to sing today at the Pride weekend at Duke's East Campus.  He is supposed to be there by 11:30am and it's 11:01am as I type and I haven't even had a shower yet.  Something tells me we won't get down there on time.  Oh well, no biggie (at least not for me).

If the rain holds off today, we should have a good day and maybe I can get by Home Goods today :)

Post Pride update:  The rain held off until after the TGMC performance and the parade.  That's Joe on the left peaking out from the balloons.

I hope everyone has a great weekend and thank you for your continued prayers and support for Joe.

Joe Is Repetitive

Joe had his weekly doctor's appointment this morning and got to see Leigh Howard after her 2 weeks off.  I know that Dr. Zafar was probably the happiest person at Duke today.  2 weeks of handling all his own appointments has probably worn him completely out.  We didn't even catch a glimpse of him today so we aren't sure if he even showed up (I'm sure he did...not the type to skip out on his job).   But today went smooth as silk.  We arrived at 6:55am, scanned in at the Kiosk, I went and got coffee & Joe his diet lemonade and by the time I got back he had already been back for his lab work.  By 7:55 we were back in an exam room and about 8:05, the nurse, Mark, was in and a few minutes later, Leigh came in, talked with us, asked the questions, did the exam and sent us on our way.  At 8:30am we were walking out and taking the elevator up to chemo where I parted ways with Joe and came on back to work.  He was called to go back for his infusion at 9:20am and was out of there in just a little over an hour later.  All in all a pretty good day.  But why you ask, did I name this post "Joe is repetitive"?  Take a look at today's photo of Joe in the exam room.

Now scroll down to last Monday's post about his CT Scan results and look at the photo.  Notice anything?  Yep, exact same clothes and Chic-fil-A cup.  Come on Joe, don't be so repetitive.....think outside the box....maybe wear a green shirt....or blue shorts....or different shoes....or oh I don't know, cross your legs the other way....anything!  

A big thank you for all the prayers and good thoughts that continue to come Joe's way.  We both are very grateful.

Some People Just Don't Learn

Can you guess to whom I am referring?  If you said, Joe Lupton, you would be correct.  Since Monday I have heard Joe tell numerous people about the great news that the tumor has not grown and then go on to say how good he's been feeling and that he hasn't had a fever since late June when we were at the beach.  He then proceeded to attend the prayer vigil in downtown Raleigh Monday night (after having his chemo treatment at Duke Monday morning), attending the prayer vigil at the legislature building in Raleigh at noon on Tuesday, in the heat, for a couple of hours on Tuesday, 2 piano students later in the afternoon, then TGMC rehearsal last night for over 2 hours.  He did sleep late this morning, but of course, he is now running a fever and in bed.  I'm trying very hard not to say "I told you so", but there, I just said it.  Some people just don't learn.

Update:  Joe kept his fever Wednesday night and missed choir practice (thanks Challie & Allana for stepping in for him).  He kept taking Tylenol every 4 hours and by Thursday morning his fever had broke and was back to normal.  He has felt tired and has been battling a headache all day.  Only a half hour before we need to leave for Bible study and not sure yet if he will be able to go.  Maybe half a night or if he isn't up to it, I'll Skype him in so he can watch & listen.   Regardless, he feels better today, but just needs to behave himself and not overdo it.

The Tone of the Day Was Set Early

Let's hope the tone of the day was not set by what happened upon arrival just before 7:00 am. The auto check-in screen at the entrance to Duke Clinic 1A wasn't working and Joe actually had to wait in line to check in. He hasn't had to do that since our very first appointment back in November 2010. Although it only took 10 minutes, we are so used to being checked in before ever entering the waiting room, but I'm sure there are worse things.

Called back for blood work at 7:25am and then vitals 5 minutes after that. Only problem was I went for coffee and Joe some juice after the blood work so we lost our good seats. Oh well, small price to pay for a great cup of coffee. It's now 8:10am and we are back in an exam room waiting for the nurse and then Dr. Zafar. Soon we'll hopefully know the CT scan results. Oh, and Joe is obsessing that he has gained 3 lbs in 2 weeks. He wants to diet now... I think not!

Dr. Zafar came in about 8:20am with a smile on his face, but then again, he always is smiling.  We haven't seen him for an appointment since early summer so it was good to talk with him.  Best part, the CT scan showed NO GROWTH!  We would have liked to see shrinkage, but we are estatic over NO GROWTH!  The tumor is the same size as back in June and so we will continue with the chemo plan with no changes. 

As you can see, Joe was all smiles, as was I, but I was behind the camera lens.  We were out of there by 8:40am and I came on to work and Joe went on up to Chemo for his 9:15am appointment.  Today has been a good day and it's still morning. :)

Thanks to everyone who has inquired, prayed and sent good thoughts and karma our way.  It seems to be working.   Thank you.