Wednesday, May 30, 2012

It's Been A Hard Days Night......

...and I've been working like a dog ( we all know that's not true in my case). It's been a hard days night! I should be sleeping like a log. (Now we're talking! That's more like it). Yes friends, I've been reduced to Beatles lyrics. But truer words have almost never been spoken, at least about the sleeping part. Joe has worked hard this week: piano lesson Monday (yes on Memorial Day- is that dedication or what?), piano lessons on Tuesday, 2 1/2 hours of chorus rehearsal Tuesday night, piano lesson on Wednesday, choir practice on Wednesday night (followed by McFlurries from McDonalds) and then chemo today. But today he does get to sleep later. His lab appointment is at 9:20a.m. and chemo at 10:30a.m. at Duke. First time in a long time that his lab appointment isn't at 7 something. Not that he is complaining! But of course, the later in the day meant the more backed up they were so he had to wait 30 minutes for his blood to be drawn and then an hour up in the chemo waiting room before getting buzzed.in to a vacant chair.  He also had a new nurse who was not very good at getting a good vein so he had to be stuck 3 times.  That always makes for a fun time!  Me?, I'm just putting in my 8-5 routine. Although with it being the end of the month that means closings and an increased workload but at least the day goes by quicker.

Before I close, Joe insisted that I mention that he got to brush Dolly really well this morning before leaving for Duke.  Why that is so important to him that it needs mentioning, I have no idea.  However, Joe does have a few idiosyncrasies.

Thank you for all the prayers and good wishes.  This makes 2 weeks down with a chemo treatment next week and then his CT scan on June 20th.

Monday, May 28, 2012

Memorial Day 2012

There's nothing like a long weekend to help rejuvenate the body. And by that I mean the extra day of sleep. Nothing does me more good than getting to sleep late. Usually it's just on Saturdays that I get those extra hours or half hours, but I also got it today! Joe and I spent the morning watching last nights shows that we recorded. As with every other day this weekend, we went to bed early. With Joe's sleeping problems following his chemo, we have tried to turn in early in an effort for him to squeeze out a little extra sleep time.

Today's Memorial Day celebration will be a "cook-in" of hamburgers, baked beans, and fries (vegi-burgers & sweet potato fries). For dessert, "pig-pickin" cake or as some call it, "punch bowl" cake. A true All American feast!  The weekend has been pretty quiet, relaxing but enjoyable. Saturday was a day of mostly resting; Sunday was church followed by lunch at The Cheesecake Factory - always a treat; and today other than the cook-in we plan to go buy some flowers to get in the planters in the front and backyards. Hopefully tonight it will not be oppresively hot & humid outside and we can sit outback and maybe even light the fire pit. Too bad medications prevent a glass of wine or it would be nearly perfect. But we are together, so regardless, we will have a good time.

This coming week should have a little slower pace for Joe. He will have his usual long chorus rehearsal tomorrow night, choir practics on Wednesday night, a free Thursday and Friday night. Sprinkled in during the day time will be a few piano students and of course, Thursday morning he has his chemo infusion at the Duke Cancer Center. All in all, a quieter than usual week for him. My week will be more of the same, with work from 8-5 although at least it will be only a 4 day week!!!

One other thing we did this weekend was make our summer vacation plans. We've put this off due to the impending move of my office to a new location but that seems to be dragging on forever so finally I just had to take the bull by the horns and schedule a vacation week. If it happens to fall during the move, I guess they will have the pleasure of moving without me. Can't say I'd be very upset if that were to happen. The thought of moving to a new location is not nearly as enticing as laying on the beach for a week. We've scheduled our week in July at our favorite beach house, "Pirate's Pride" at Holden Beach. We've been to it many times before and love it's location and amenities.  Let's just hope this year there isn't a repeat of last years "Joe fever day" where I packed up everything at 5am to leave and then spent the day with him in bed and me pacing. The rest of the time there we lived out of the suitcases and bags since I wouldn't allow him to unpack, just in case. Only 6 weeks until vacation! Whoo Hoo!!

We hope everyone has had a wonderful Memorial Day weekend and will have an enjoyable week ahead.  Thank you for your prayers and support!
We love all of you!

Thursday, May 24, 2012

5/24/12 Lab, Doctor & Chemo Visit at Duke

Good news this morning.  No fever for Joe.  Had his initial labs before 7:20am and saw the doctor (both Leigh Howard and Dr. Zafar) at 8:20am and were done with that part by 9am.  The doctor ordered additional lab work to be done before his chemo appointment.  Some more extensive labs to maybe see if they can find a reason for the fevers.  But, apparently there is some confusion at the lab so Joe is still waiting (an hour now) for the blood to be drawn.   But he will have his chemo as scheduled, if he ever gets up to the 4th floor for them.  Which he did at 10:30am.

P.S. Joe was irritated that I didn't mention the fact that he got a bed today for his chemo infusion instead of a chair. The chairs were all full so he got to lay down. A first for him. My humblest apologies for my neglect in not reporting this earth shattering news of his.


Have a great day and thanks for caring!

Wednesday, May 23, 2012

The "No Chemo" Week is Supposed to be Uneventful

My understanding thus far through this journey is that the "no chemo" week should be uneventful.  Don't really know why I have that understanding, I just do.  One would think by now that I would have learned the error in my thinking but apparently I haven't.  Last summer during our week at the beach, which was a "no chemo" week, Joe started with chills, fever and had a really rotten day, but got over it.  A couple of months later, same thing.  Back in March, on a Thursday of a "no chemo" week, he was running a fever and we had to cancel our plans for the evening.  Joe hasn't had chemo since May 10th.  Last week was no chemo week.  So why does it surprise me that today, Wednesday, the day before his next doctors appointment and treatment, he has chills and is running a fever.  Have I actually become an optimist?  Is that why these fevers surprise me?  I'm finding it hard to believe that cynical me can change an attitude like that.  It's probably more likely that I'm just in denial.  At least this time, he has a scheduled doctors appointment the day after the symptons.  But anyway..........

With Wednesday's fever and chills, Joe had to cancel his planned lunch (he has a group of friends that have a standing lunch on Wednesday) as well as his piano students and choir practice at PGUMC.  The piano students were probably dissappointed but I'm sure the choir danced a little jig when they found out no practice.  I have to admit I'm glad to not have the drive to Raleigh and back.

Thursday, Joe has a labs appointment at 7:20am followed by his oncology appointment at 8:20am at Duke.  For some reason, his chemo isn't scheduled until 11:30am but after he is done with his doctors appointment, he will go ahead and check in at the chemo infusion center.  Hopefully they will be able to squeeze him in a little early.  If there is an open chair, maybe they will pop him down in it and he won't have to wait in the waiting room (although it is very nice) for a couple of hours.  Of course, this is all assuming that his fever is gone and they will even do the infusion.   Only time will tell at this point.

I'll pop a quick post in tomorrow morning when we know what the doctor says and if the chemo is indeed happening.

Thank you to everyone for your well wishes to Joe on Facebook today and as always, for the prayers and support.

Friday, May 18, 2012

YAY! We Made It To the End of Disciple Bible Study

Disciple Bible Study at PGUMC is a 32 week course delving into the historical, contextual and of course religous perspectives of the Bible.  When we started out, the evening portion of the study had 30+ members.  There was also a morning group, but alas, we never had the opportunity to sit in on any of their sessions, but we did hear about topics of discussion of the morning class from Jay Minnick, our minister.  The evening group was a lively bunch but as the weeks progressed, especially during the Old Testament, we did see a certain attrition of members.  Slowly we would notice people not attending.  This was to be expected as some people, actually most people, didn't really realize the time commitment to see it to the end.  Although a 32 week course, it ran about 38 as we did have time off during Christmas and Easter where we didn't meet.  I'm not sure if anyone actually made it to all 32 weeks.  Maybe there was 1 or 2, if so, please speak up as I would like to know who your were.  Joe and I missed for a Paul Simon concert one night and then we each had a week where one was sick and so we didn't attend.  I think I missed 3 and Joe missed 4, but considering this started last summer and just ended this week, making it to that many is still impressive to me.  I think the consensus from everyone was that we had a good time, learned a lot, both about the Bible and about ourselves.  It was a great atmosphere where anyone could ask any question, express any doubt or any opinion.  We all became very comfortable with one another and I think we will all miss our Thursday nights.  Also, we had GREAT SNACKS!  Hopefully some of us, if not all of us, will continue on with some "shorter" courses that are planned for the fall and next spring.

Last night was our last gathering and it will be memorable.  Those in attendance know what I am talking about!  We had a great pot luck dinner at Larry's house where everyone contributed.  Thanks Larry for being a wonderful host.

Joe and I will miss our Thursdays, but at the same time, it will be nice to have at least for the summer, a free night.   Thanks to everyone in Disciple Bible Study for being so supportive and for being our friends.  We both feel like we have gained some long lasting relationships with all of you.
Jay, Cheryl, Susan, Rebecca, Phil, Larry, Matt, Mike, Tim, Joe, Pat, Anna, Connie, Sheila, Joe & Me (not in that order)....and Meredith taking the photo!  And of course, Emmie in Anna's arms.  Yes, we had a baby born during the time of the course.  Like I said, it's a long course!

Monday, May 14, 2012

Emily's Graduation Party

We just wanted to say a big thank you to Emily Lupton for inviting us to her graduation party yesterday. We had a great time being with family and friends, not to mention the food was delicious.  We are very proud of Emily and all she has accomplished.  She will be going to Uganda again this summer for a month to work.  She is a beautiful and driven young lady with a great head on her shoulders.  After this summer she will be off to Tampa to the University of South Florida (Go Bulls!)
Emily isn't really that tall.  Joe and I are squatting some and she is on her tip-toes but this way we all three fit into the photo.  It was a beautiful day and we had a great time.  Thanks to the Lupton's for a wonderful afternoon!  Have some fun before you are off to Uganda Emily, you've earned it.

Sunday, May 13, 2012

A Long and Emotional Weekend

It's only Saturday night, but it has already been a long emotional weekend for Joe. Last night was the visitation for Joe's aunt Sue. We left Durham around 4:30 yesterday afternoon heading for Rocky Mount and The Church of the Good Shepard Episcopal Church. We arrived early enough to get some dinner before the visitation, however, the GPS apparently was really confused and instead of taking us to McDonald's where we could take advantage of the free wi-fi, it announced "you have arrived" in front of Hardee's. Rather than wondering aimlessly around Rocky Mount, we just pulled in and had burgers there. Afterwards we went on to the Church for the visitation. Joe held his composure until he went up to his cousin Kim, Sue's daughter. The sudden loss of her mother was very hard on her and her girls. We just drifted around talking to more relatives for the next couple of hours. Catching up on things with Whitney, Emily, Mark, Katie, Renee, Ted, Tommie, Mary Kay, Ellyn, and Brittany. Sadly, funerals are sometimes the only time you see relatives for years at a time. Hearing the cousins talk about their childhood adventures was very enjoyable to me and Joe's mood brightened up somewhat. One of his cousins was graduating from NC State today -- woo hoo Emily!!!! -- so we spent some time with her inquiring about her future plans. She is quite an impressive young lady. Tomorrow we will be going by their house for a graduation celebration for her.

Today however was Sue's funeral so we drove back to Rocky Mount again. It was a beautiful service in a lovely Church. Even though Episopal, we did sing a couple of Baptist standards - "Amazing Grace" and "Blessed Assurance" and after the eulogy and prayers we participated in Holy Communion. A reception followed and we left Rocky Mount around 5 pm and headed back home. We were both very tired by the time we got home so we just popped out for a salad at a nearby salad bar restaurant and we both went upstairs to bed around 9 pm. It's 9:43 pm as I type this and Joe is already fast asleep. Chemo on Thursday, followed by 2 emotional and travel filled days has taken a bit of a toll on him. He's been complaining of being cold all night and about 30 minutes ago said he was now hot. I hope all this activity hasn't been too much on him. What he needs most right now is rest.

We did see his mother and sister in Rocky Mount of course and the best way to describe it was "awkward". Joe did speak to both of them and I spoke to his mother but only to say hello. I'm not ready for more than that just yet. It was clear that our distance hurt her and for that I'm sorry but there has been no conversation yet about resolving the issues at hand and neither Joe or I are willing to just pretend things are like they used to be and nothing has happened. At Sue's funeral was not an appropriate time to get into it either.

Tomorrow, Sunday, we have a full day of 2 church services in the morning and then Emily's party in the afternoon. I was supposed to mow the yard this weekend but it looks like it might be Monday evening before that happens. I can procrastinate with the best of them!

I meant to post this Saturday night, but apparently I was as tired as Joe because I fell asleep while typing. I woke up at 1 am with the iPad on my chest.

Thank you to all who have expressed their condolences to Joe on the loss of his aunt Sue and continue to lift him up in their prayers. Your support and love is felt very strongly. Thank you.

Thursday, May 10, 2012

Third Chemo Infusion of this 3 Week Cycle...CHECK!

This morning Joe had his final round of this chemo cycle at the Duke Cancer Center.  He now gets a week off!  Lucky him!  Although his lab work was done in a timely manner, he had to wait until 9:30ish for his 8:30am appointment.  His lab work this time showed his white cell count very low so he has to be aware of anyone with sniffles or cold/flu like symptons for the next week or so.  I'm sure there will be a lot of hand washing going on along with lots of hand sanitizers.  But he got his infusion done and that is the most important thing.

This has been a particularly trying week for Joe.  On Sunday afternoon soon after returning home from church, he received a text from his sister informing him that his Aunt Sue had died during the night.  This came as a big shock to the entire family since she had not previously been ill.  They did an autopsy to determine the cause of death but as of yet, we have not learned the cause.  His late aunt and her husband, Ward, live in Rocky Mount so that is where we will be spending a large portion of the weekend.  Tomorrow evening is the visitation and then the funeral will be on Saturday.  Besides having to deal with the loss of his aunt, whom he loved dearly, this weekend means that we will be in the presence of his mother and sister for the first time since the "ruckus" of March.  Already, both of us are tensing up over that aspect.

On a lighter note, we will have the chance to see our niece Brittany.  This will be the first time we have seen her since her recent gall bladder surgery.  That part we are both looking forward too.  Also, this week, of course, was the Amendment One debacle.  That right there was enough to cast a dark shadow over everything but last night we shook off the blues and went to see "Wicked" at DPAC.  This was our 4th time and we loved it as much as the first time.  Ironically, Joe's Aunt Sue had been at DPAC last Thursday to see "Wicked" and had remarked to Joe afterwards that she wanted to see it again.  We wish she could have been there with us last night.  Joe had organized a group of 48 people, mostly from PGUMC, to see the show and from what I overheard from those in attendance, it was a big success.  It was great to see so many people out of the usual PGUMC setting.  I don't even remember everyone who was there but we did have a chance to talk to Challie, Lucinda, Danny, Julie, Elizabeth, Colin, Meredith, Julia, Paul, Meagan, Donna, Mike....oh, there's no use in me trying to remember everyone we talked too.  Joe's cousin Steve Woolum even came over from Asheville for the show.  We had a great time and hope everyone who was in attendance did too!

Thanks to everyone who has emailed, called and texted us this week offering support.  Your prayers and good thoughts are so greatly appreciated.
 

Saturday, May 5, 2012

Amendment One

We have not written specifically about Amendment One on here. But with the impending vote on May 8th, and the fact that many members of our family have differing views than us and possibly even some friends, we feel we need to make this one appeal. You know us. You know what we are going through health wise. You know that we were married in Connecticut last year which makes this Amendment in our home state even more appalling to us. We feel that many people simply do not understand the far reaching implications if/when this passes. Many use their "faith" or the Bible as their justification. Below is just a sampling of recent articles and editorials from Ministers from a wide range of faiths and constitutional law attorneys & professors who give both legal and faith based opinions on why they are AGAINST Amendment One. If you find yourself in favor of the amendment or have not decided which way you will vote, please take some time to read the articles and truly inform yourselves.

Amendment One and an old American struggle
By Dr. H. Stephen Shoemaker
http://www.charlotteobserver.com/2012/04/29/3205743/amendment-one-and-an-old-american.html

I might begin my opposition to Amendment One by saying that it is badly written law which will harm many individuals and families in unintended ways, be tied up in the courts for years and cause needless suffering and expense. I could say that it builds discrimination into the foundational legal document of our state. These things would be true.

But I write as a Baptist minister to defend something dear: the separation of church and state and religious liberty. Sometimes moral conflict is not between good and evil but between competing moral goods. You could frame this debate as between one moral good, the support of traditional marriage and family, and another moral good, the extending of dignity, rights and equal protection under the law to all people.

The question is which moral good should be encoded as the law of the land? And this is where the struggle in the “American Soul” comes in. It is a struggle over 300 years old. The Puritan ideal of the Massachusetts Bay Colony was that America was “the New Israel,” that we were a “city set on a hill,” to use John Winthrop’s words. Therefore, the church and state should work hand-in-hand to set into law the religious and moral code of its people. It was a form of theocracy led by the religious and political leaders of the dominant religion of the land.
Read the full article by clicking on the link below the heading above.
Dr. H. Stephen Shoemaker is senior minister at Myers Park Baptist Church in Charlotte

WINSTON-SALEM CLERGY AGAINST AMENDMENT ONE
http://www.protectallncfamilies.org/news/winston-salem-clergy-against-amendment-one

As the May 8 primary date nears, North Carolina clergy continue to speak out against Amendment One and the harms it will cause to North Carolina families.
Below is a statement by Winston-Salem clergy:

As Christian clergy from a broad spectrum of denominations, and with differing understandings of marriage, we stand united in opposition to North Carolina’s Amendment One. We oppose the Amendment due to our understanding of a loving God and our conviction that it contradicts our religious principles.   The Amendment is poorly written.  As preachers of the Word, we know the power of language to create reality.  Without changing the reality that same-sex marriage is unrecognized by North Carolina state law, this amendment creates other unintended and unacceptable realities. 
Read the full article by clicking the link below the heading above

Editorial: Flawed - Amendment should be voted down. Fayetteville Observer
http://m.fayobserver.com/articles/2012/04/29/1174162

For many North Carolina voters, the constitutional amendment on the primary ballot makes good sense. For some conservatives, traditionalists and many people of faith, the ballot speaks their belief: "... marriage between one man and one woman is the only domestic legal union that shall be valid or recognized in this state." But it's not that simple. As with many seemingly straightforward propositions, this one comes loaded with unintended (and some intended) consequences. Voters will help the state avoid some extensive damage if they reject the amendment. How bad would it be? Family law professors from every law school in North Carolina released a statement on the amendment last week, pointing out its problems. The amendment, they said, "is vague and untested, and threatens harm to a broad range of North Carolina families. The amendment is phrased more broadly than most similar amendments in other states, and would therefore likely be construed by courts more broadly than in other states." Among other things, the legal scholars say, the amendment would ban same-sex marriages (which is why many voters will approve it). But it also would do these things, which might not be what the voters have in mind:
Read the full article by clicking the link below the heading above

Who the Marriage Amendment is Aimed At
http://www.newsobserver.com/2012/05/01/2034592/who-the-amendment-is-aimed-at.html
Bt Jeffrey Pugh - NewsObserver.com

For many of the amendment's proponents, this is a matter faith, of enforcing the biblical prohibition of homosexuality. We appreciate and respect those religious beliefs, but we cannot agree with their incorporation into our state's constitution. The First Amendment to the U.S. Constitution forbids the passage of any law "respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof." This amendment would clearly impose "an establishment of religion" on people with differing beliefs. For all of those reasons, we urge North Carolina voters to reject the constitutional amendment on our primary ballot. It is a badly flawed exercise that will cause legal havoc. If a majority of our lawmakers is determined to do what the amendment says, and only what it says, they should go back to their legal drawing boards and do the job right.

Dad,” she said, looking at me with fear and hope, “I’m gay.” I’m sure the fear was because she wasn’t sure how I was going to respond to the news of her discovery. Perhaps she wondered if her ordained United Methodist father, like her church, was going to reject her. She may have had reason to fear her church, but not me. That was where the hope came in. I think about my daughter frequently these days. I must confess, it is hard not to think that Amendment One is just a cynical ploy by politicians who want to keep us divided from one another so they can maintain their hold on power. That, at least, would be understandable. As long as there have been people who desire social power, “divide and rule” has been a time-tested strategy. However, most people who plan to vote for this amendment will do so out of religious convictions. Because of the way that they interpret the Bible they have arrived at a particular abhorrence about homosexuality that they don’t have about divorce, something Jesus addressed directly.
Read the full article by clicking the link below the heading above.

Potential Legal Implications of Passage of Amendment One
http://www.law.unc.edu/documents/faculty/marriageamendment/dlureportnov8.pdf

This is a long, but information filled article from the UNC Law School. Click the link above to read it in full.

It Goes Way Beyond Marriage
By Shannon Gilreath
http://www.newsobserver.com/2012/05/03/2039424/it-goes-way-beyond-marriage.html

I do not favor gay marriage. I do not personally believe that gay people should marry in this state or any other. This conviction is based on reasons likely very different from those of Amendment One’s supporters. Nevertheless, I oppose Amendment One.

The pertinent observation is that Amendment One is not about marriage. If the legislators giving us Amendment One want to write a constitutional amendment to ban gay marriage, they can do so in simple language. I’ll even suggest some language here: “Marriages between individuals of the same gender are not valid in North Carolina.”

Incidentally, North Carolina already has a law that says just that, enacted in 1995. Clearly, if our legislators believe that a majority of us want a law banning gay marriage, they know how to write one. Instead, Amendment One, before voters on Tuesday, says: “Marriage between a man and a woman is the only domestic legal union that shall be valid or recognized in this State.” The phrase “domestic legal union” does not appear anywhere else in the North Carolina general statutes. Thus, we don’t really know what kinds of “domestic unions” will be affected. So Amendment One’s vagueness makes its potential applications far greater than its propagandized limitations.

Although its language quite clearly reaches beyond marriage to also prohibit the possibility of civil unions for gays, the reality is that more heterosexuals will be affected by this amendment than homosexuals. Here are some possibilities.
Read the full article by clicking the link below the heading above.

Don’t blame the Bible
By Leonard Pitts, Jr.
http://www.miamiherald.com/2012/05/01/2778054_dont-blame-the-bible.html#storylink=addthis

Sometimes, people hide inside the Bible.

That is, they use the Christian holy book as authority and excuse for biases that have nothing to do with God. They did this when women sought to vote and when African Americans sought freedom. They are doing it now, as gay men and lesbians seek the right to be married. The latest battleground in that fight is North Carolina, where voters go to the polls Tuesday to render a verdict on Amendment One, which would add to the state constitution the following stipulation: “Marriage between one man and one woman is the only domestic legal union that shall be valid or recognized in this state.”

Mind you, the Tarheel State already has a law on the books banning same-sex marriage. The would-be constitutional amendment is meant to double down on exclusion. And if you read the language carefully, you saw what many observers have seen — that it can also be interpreted as denying legal recognition to unmarried heterosexuals. Not that this holds any sway with those who hide inside the Bible. “God has defined marriage,” said Family Research Council President Tony Perkins in a Sunday sermon quoted in the Charlotte Observer. “It is not up to us to redefine it.” In a letter to the editor, an Observer reader put it thusly: “You either believe [the Bible] or not.”
Read the full article by clicking the link below the heading above.

The Marriage Amendment, 1875
By Gene Nichol
http://www.newsobserver.com/2012/05/05/2044515/the-marriage-amendment-1875.html

If Amendment One passes on Tuesday, it won’t be our first state constitutional provision regulating marriage. In 1875, we altered our charter to declare that “all marriages between a white person and a Negro or between a white person and a person of Negro descent to the third generation inclusive are, hereby, forever prohibited.”

The 1875 amendment, too, was adopted shortly (two years) after an invigorated anti-miscegenation statute had been enacted by the legislature. Even more clearly than is the case today, the proponents could not have worried that an amendment was actually needed. No one fretted that a 19th century North Carolina court would invalidate the earlier separationist statutory rule.
Read the full article by clicking the link below the heading above

Thank you for your thoughtfulness in taking the time to read this and consider the importance it has to us specifically, but to hundreds of thousands if not millions of residents of the State of North Carolina



Wednesday, May 2, 2012

Sometimes you just can't escape

Now what on earth could I mean by that you ask. Well I will get to that quick enough, but first a Joe update. Tomorrow he will have his second round of chemo of this 3 week cycle at Duke. No doctors appointment, just labs at 7:20am and chemo at 8:20am. He should have time in between to go to the food court and get him some breakfast. If all goes on time, he should be done somwhere around 9:30am. We've got our fingers crossed on that one! His right leg is still swollen from the knee down, although possibly not as bad. He is under strict orders (from me of course) to mention this to the nurse when she is doing vitals and blood work so that it gets mentioned in his chart. He's gotten reasonably good at following direction so I won't hound him about it.

At 9am tomorrow morning, our niece Brittany is having surgery in Greenville. Although the procedure is expected to go smoothly, it is nonetheless surgery and she is only 13. She is quite scared, as anyone would be, but Joe and I have both been keeping up with her daily. It will be an anxious morning waiting to hear that she is out of surgery and all went well. Please keep her in your thoughts and prayers.

Now for the "Sometimes you just can't escape" title. I was raised, as was Joe, in a Southern Baptist Church. The Southern Baptist of our time however, is a far cry from the Baptist of today. I was out of the church before the book burning in the seminaries and the fundamentalists took hold with a very tight grip. Other than for my mother's funeral and the funeral last year of Miriam Batten, I haven't stepped foot in the church I was raised in for more than 37 years. 2 times in 37 years isn't much, right? I felt I had justification as I no longer shared the belief system that the more fundamentalist Baptist church now held. So why go if you don't believe as they do? Since moving to Durham 13 years ago, I sporadically attended Pleasant Grove UMC where Joe was the music director and eventual member. Special music occassions or when Joe would beg were about all the church I had "in me". When Joe was diagnosed, I started attending more and more regularly and last year became a member. I have loved each and every moment shared with all my new friends at PGUMC. Everyone there has been welcoming, friendly, caring and supportive. I can't say enough about how wonderful the church is and how much I enjoy being a part of it. The past 2 weeks has been the 2012 General Conference for the United Methodist Church. This is an event that is held every 4 years where the "business" of the church is petitioned, discussed and voted on. Some petition items never make it out of committee, while others do make it out and onto a general vote. This year there were many petitions to make the UMC a more welcoming and inclusive Church. Most notably, a multitude of petitions to have certain passages in the Book of Discipline removed and replaced with more "accepting/inclusive" language. To be direct, removal of language stating that gay persons and the church are incompatible. I have used the GC2012 APP to keep up with each of the petitions (there were lots of them) and have checked the results of voting daily as well as daily recaps also included in the APP. To say that things did not go well would be a HUGE understatement. Rather than more accepting, the language that has been adopted is more critical and homophobic than before. The extreme conservative and more fundamental elements of the Church seem to have prevailed at this conference and rather than things getting better, they seem to have gotten worse. Therefore, my title, "Sometimes you just can't escape". I thought I had gotten away from the bigotry exhibited by the Southern Baptist Church only to find myself a member of the United Methodist Church when it seems to be heading in the same direction.
What's a person to do? You love your local church, in this case Pleasant Grove UMC, yet you find yourself at odds with the changing tide of the greater UMC.

Vaccination date set

 This morning at 8 a.m. we began the process of trying to get an appointment date.  I had 3 appointments at the Duke Cancer Center so I was ...