Saturday, January 24, 2015

It Really Is Official This Time

After 2 delays it is now official...well at least the announcement will be on Tuesday.  I am the new Corporate Relocation Manage for Coldwell Banker Advantage.  Corporately relocating buyers and sellers that come through the Coldwell Banker Relocation Department will now be my responsibility. I am headquartered at our Raleigh Corporate office and cover all our offices in the Triangle, Lake Gaston, Goldsboro, Clarksville, VA, Fayetteville & Southern Pines.  That's a wide swath of NC folks!  I've been working 1 day a week in Relocation since December and then once January came around, twice a week.  Originally I was told my start date would be 1/5/2015, but then it was moved to 1/15/15 and now 1/27/15.  However those are just the announcement dates.  I've being doing the job full time since 1/16.  Since I was replacing someone, they needed to wait until that was all settled.  The agents in my former office (Chapel Hill) do not know but will find out on Tuesday the 27th at our  scheduled business meeting.  The owner of the company will be on hand for the announcement and he's asked me to come into the Chapel Hill office to say goodbye.  It will be a bittersweet moment I'm sure.  The folks there have been a huge part of my life for nearly 9 years.  They've seen me through ups and downs including all of Joe's cancer treatments and then the aftermath of his passing.

I know I will miss them, but this is an extremely good opportunity for me and at my age, a chance for advancement can't be passed up.  It of course also means that I will be working in Raleigh full time and so the extended plan that I've had for the past couple of years to maybe move over to the Raleigh area seems much more likely.  I don't imagine I will do anything this Spring as I'm not sure I can't take a job change and a house change all at one time.  I have quite the learning curve to adjust to with the job and just with one week under my belt, I can tell it can be very stressful at times.  I don't need to compound that just yet.  At least not unless the perfect condo/townhouse appears in the perfect area in Raleigh!  This piece has fallen into place so with just a little more luck, maybe the housing piece will work out too.  Lord knows I'm due for a change in fortune, a change in my life, A CHANGE!

I am really excited about all of this and I hope those of you still reading this will be happy for me.  Hey, I'm writing about good news.  How long has it been since I've done that?  Have I ever done that?

I hope everyone is off to a wonderful 2015.  Mine is looking up!

"And suddenly you know: It's time to start something new and trust the magic of beginnings." 
                                                                                                                                    - Meister Eckhart

Tuesday, December 30, 2014

New Job Update

Got the date today when I officially begin my new position at work....1/15/2015.  Very excited about the possibilities.  Details once the company makes the change public next week.  

Friday, December 19, 2014

Lake Lure 2014

Not much to say other than it was a very relaxing week heading into Christmas & New Years.  Not a bad way to end 2014.

My morning view.

Outside the Wellness Center at Rumbling Bald Resort (where Dirty Dancing exterior shots were filmed)

Lake Lure itself. (somewhat drained near the resort for maintenance to the boardwalk)

The rumbling creek that feeds Lake Lure.

Lake Lure

The mountain scape near Point of View

The Broad River below Chimney Rock.

The view above Chimney Rock Village

The playground at Rumbling Bald Resort (Aimee getting her child on)

Chimney Rock Village.

Lake Lure boardwalk renovation

Welcome to Lake Lure

Me and Phyllis below Chimney Rock.

Saturday, November 29, 2014

Christmas 2014

I asked a Facebook question a week or so ago about whether or not I should even bother to put up decorations this year.  I received a resounding, "YES, YOU SHOULD".  So I went with the majority, even though my preference is never to go with what the majority wants, and put up some decorations.  Granted, this year there is even less than last year, but I should at least get props for trying.  Although I went very minimal, I am happy with the results.  Since my signature color has always been red (now if that doesn't sound queer, I don't know what does...I have a signature color), having more red throughout the house is definitely to my liking.  Maybe it will do the trick and cheer me up.  Hey, it can't hurt!

Merry Christmas

Tuesday, November 25, 2014


When the word of the day is random, you can pretty much expect my thoughts to wander, and wander, and maybe even wonder.

"What doesn't kill you makes you stronger".  What the heck is that supposed to mean?  I'm no spring chicken, I've been through a lot in my life, maybe not what many people have been through, but I've had more than my share of woes and I'm here to tell you that that is BS...a huge stinking wad of bulls*it.   My experience is that "what doesn't kill you" usually leaves you broken, bruised, scarred, unable to cope and barely able to keep your head above water.  I mean really, who thought of that?  Then there is "God doesn't give you more than you can handle".  Again, total BS.  What is the point of "giving no more than you can handle"?  Growth?  Excuse me but I'd rather remain stagnant than have to go through the pain in order to come out the other side having grown as a person.  I know, cynical.

Beneath the Darkness.  How dark can a day get?  When the dark never lifts, do you continue to describe it as darkness or do you just concede that it's called your life?  At what point do you just say screw it?  And if you do say screw it, what then?  What if you've said screw it and nothing has changed?  What motivates someone who is feeling hopeless to even get out of bed?  Where do they look for motivation?  Friends?, family?, faith?, therapy?  That isn't a rhetorical question, where?  I'd really like to know if someone has an idea or two to share.

How are you -or- How are you doing?   When you ask someone that question, do you really want to know or are you just being socially pleasant?  My theory, based on my vast (well, maybe not so vast, but I have been asked that A LOT), is that people don't really want to know.  They are much more comfortable when the questioned individual just smiles and says "fine", or "ok", or really stretches the truth and says "good".  Last year I had friends that lost their elementary school age daughter.  These friends are not people that I am particularly close too, I haven't seen them in some time, however given the fact that we both suffered losses in 2013, we do share some common history.  Now please, do not for one second think that I am equating the loss of Joe to the loss of their daughter.  I don't have a child and can never fully understand how that feels just as they don't know the feeling of loosing a spouse (and I pray they never do).  We've never "measured" our losses against one another, but have simply said I'm so sorry for your loss.  But we do share a level of understanding when it comes to how others outside our "grief sphere" react to us, talk to us, expect things from us.  Since I don't want to assume that they would like their names on my blog, I'll just call the mom, "Nellie".  Nellie and I have communicated through email & Facebook for the past year and a half.  In many ways, our thought processes on grief and the expectations of others is very similar.  We share one very real and very common similarity.  We are both so very tired of smiling and pretending we are okay.  I've had that fake smile plastered on my face when in public for so long, I'm almost starting to forget what my real smile looks like.  Just once, I'd like for someone to instead of asking how I'm doing, just tell me not to pretend to be ok and if I want to just be myself, to meet them for coffee, a meal or a drink sometime.  That, I might actually climb out of bed for.  Nellie, if you're reading this, can you and me get together sometime to be real?  Hey, we might even be able to have a laugh after we stop crying.  So people, next time you see someone you haven't seen in a while or you see someone who has had some recent trials or tribulations, don't ask how they are.  Don't ask them anything.  Just tell them it is good to see them.  Answering questions is usually not high on the list of things they want to do, especially if you are just being polite and don't really have an hour or so to hear how they are really doing.

Meltdown in progress.  Joe, wherever you may be, please tell me what to do.

Alone.  Enough said.