'twas the night before......

...CT Scan results and there were lots of whispers, loud talking, television playing, typing and anything to detract from the elephant in the room--the results.  Joe had his labs and the CT scan on Wednesday morning.  Everything went fine and on time.  By 9am he was back home and relaxing with Dolly.  We haven't really talked about it but it's there, we both know it and the anxiety level just creeps higher as the night falls.

We did take an anxiety break Wednesday night and took a drive down the new 540 before the toll begins on Thursday.  I'm sure everyone is surprised at us taking such a thrilling adventure on the night before we get the scan results.  Yes it was an amazing experience.  We were both overwhelmed with excitement. We came back home exhilarated and astonished at all the fun we had.  Imagine, riding down 6 miles of highway without paying for it.  It's hard to match that when it comes to having fun!! :) (for anyone confused, that was filled with sarcasm).

But after a very long night, a VERY long mostly sleepless until this morning just prior to the alarm screaming in my ear, we're off to the Duke Cancer Center for the appointment with Dr. Zafar and/or Leigh Howard at 8:20 am this morning.

It may seem like it was a lonely walk for Joe over to the Cancer Center but I just had to hang back for the photo op.  I ran to catch up afterwards.  We're all checked in and waiting. 

The waiting is over and the results were anything but what we were hoping for.  Since the last scan 6 weeks ago, the tumor in the pancreas has grown approximately 20% more and is now at 3.8cm.  Also, several lesions have appeared on his liver, the largest of which is 1.7cm.  What this means, time to change to a much more aggressive chemo treatment.  First up, Joe will have a port inserted next Wednesday and then the first treatment will be Monday, August 13th.  No more of the 1 hr treatments.  The new procedure will last 5-8 hrs every 2 weeks with the addition of a 46 hr pump that he will go home with and then Home Health Care will come disconnect on Wednesday.  There are three drugs involved: Irinotecan, Oxaliplatin and 5-Fluorouracil (in case anyone wants to Google them).  The side effects will be more severe so we will just have to monitor and adjust accordingly.

Of course we are a little overwhelmed right now, and not in a good way.  It will probably take a few days or maybe longer for it to really sink in.  Numb is the word of the day I guess.  Joe has just gone back for some lab work in prep for next weeks port insertion and I'm sitting here typing and crying.  Strangely, here at the Cancer Center, that isn't unique behavior.

Joe came out from labs and we went downstairs to the food court so he could have breakfast since he hadn't eaten all day. A few more tears flowed from both of us down there as well.  It was while there that Joe had the realization that since he wasn't having chemo today he would have to pay for parking.  As if our day wasn't bad enough, now he has to fork over $3.00. 

To all those who have reached out to us with prayers and support, we thank you and hope you will continue to help us.  You are loved by each of us and greatly appreciated.