Pursue Love

Today in Glastonbury, Connecticut, Rev. Kate VanDerzee-Glidden of First Church of Christ, Congregational preached a sermon based on 1Corinthians 14:1, "Pursue Love".  Kate is one of the ministers that married me and Joe.  She tells her own story of fear relating to the events of mine and Joe's wedding.  Of course I cried.  I think most people would when they hear their own story used in a sermon.  I think most people would if they heard someone else tell their love story.  I've listened to many sermons from the podcast site that Kate has preached.  She is always eloquent, personal, and listeners must relate well to her.  I know I do.  If you have a spare 19 minutes, take a listen.   You will be glad you did.

First Church of Christ, Congregational 3.9.2014

Please remember that Relay for Life is just around the corner.  I would appreciate any and all support.  You can click on the box at the top right to make a donation or if you would like to join the team, you can find that area of the site by following the same link.

We walk all night because cancer never sleeps.

Peace,
Jeff

Good Week....After A Great Weekend

Good week.....after a great weekend.
Last weekend Rob & Lola visited for 2 days and I had a blast!  They arrived just after lunchtime on Saturday.  Lola had texted me earlier that she had a nail "crisis" and needed a salon immediately. Well one thing that we are not short of here in the Southpoint area of Durham is nail salons.  I found her three within 1/2 mile and she called the first one on the list to make sure they could see her...and they could in 15 minutes.  So off to the Renaissance Center we went and dropped her off in front.  Rob and I miraculously found a Starbucks to get some coffee (I know, they are hard to find right??).  It was nice outside so we sat out front and talked about a variety of topics until Lola called saying she was done.  Within minutes we had her in the back of my car and guess what she wanted...you guessed it, Starbucks.  So back we went.

After that adventure, we came back home and talked for a couple of hours before leaving for dinner at Nantucket Grill.  That's absolutely one of my favorite restaurants (I always get the "Cranberry Bog", but with the new diet, not that night....the buffalo chicken salad instead) and on Tuesday and Saturday nights you get free desserts!  Once again, I couldn't eat it (the diet, remember) but since it is free, I ordered Lola's second choice.  We had to almost threaten Rob to get him to order.  He was all "I don't want dessert.  There's nothing I want".  But dude...it's free! So he did order the peanut butter & chocolate cake and Lola got the coconut cake. (I got the lemon cake for take home for them).

Obviously, once Rob got the cake he dove in.  I was afraid he would choke on the size of the pieces.  We laughed at him so much.  We even had someone from another table come over to comment!  Once we got home, we were here for just a few minutes before Bettie and the kids arrived.  We had a short but very nice visit before they were off to pick up friends at the airport.

Sunday brought church at 11a.m. (thank you PGUMC for being so welcoming of my friends) where Rob & Lola made quite a splash.  Everyone loves them.  But then, I shouldn't be surprised, they are incredible people.  After church was lunch at Saladelia, home for a pit stop where Lola announced she was in a food coma and collapsed on the bed.  However, her bed stop was short lived.  We were meeting her niece and fiancee in Wake Forest at 4pm so off we were back to Wake County.  We had a nice time visiting with Mariah & Jeremy.  The house they are renting is SOOOooo cute and the gym they now own is fantastic.  We also made a side trip to see the church where they are being married and the venue for the reception.  Then of course, it was meal time again.  After a brief post dinner visit we made our way back to Durham, talking and laughing again.
I talked their heads off.  Poor Rob and Lola, they put up with me going on and on.  Not a surprise to anyone who knows me well, huh?  The highlight of the night was talking to Siri in different languages.  It may sound lame, but three people who are tired, have eaten way to much, laying on a large wrap around sofa, can have some good laughs at Siri's expense.

Of course throughout the weekend there were moments where tears flowed, but all in all, we stayed upbeat and laughed so much more.  I was so sad to see them leave on Monday.  That was really the saddest part of the entire weekend.  Two people that Joe loved so much.  When they left, I couldn't help but think about when we were leaving Connecticut after getting married and as Joe and I got to the top of the escalator at the airport, Joe turned and with tears running down his face, said "I don't want to leave them".  I know he was afraid that he might not live long enough to see them again, but he did on our first anniversary last August when we got to spend the weekend with them. We had a blast that weekend with a BIG party and the house was teaming with life and wall to wall people.  This past weekend however, I got to experience a little bit of that again with Rob & Lola.

Thank you Rob and Lola for being such amazing friends to me.  I love both of you with all my heart.  You gave so much to me and Joe.  I can never thank you enough for all that you did for us.

The rest of the week was good as well.  Work was okay, I got my four nights in the gym and this morning when I weighed, I had hit the 37 pound loss!!!!!!! YAY!!!!  Exercise and watching your diet really does work.  It feels awesome.

Anticipation for next weekend

It's been more than a week since my last post.  Main reason, I've just been keeping myself busy.  I returned to work last week after my "vacation" and although I had gone in over the weekend to catch up on quite a bit of the closings, sales and new listings, there was still plenty of work on Monday to make the day go by quickly.  There was even a little left over to fill up a good portion of Tuesday.  However, after that, work slowed down quite a bit and when that happens, the days seem almost endless.  I believe I read every story posted on WRAL.com, Newsobserver.com and various other news sites on Wednesday thru Friday.  I am well caught up on current events.

Monday, Wednesday, and Thursday I went straight to the YMCA after work and so I didn't get home until 7:30-8pm each of those nights.  Saturday morning I mowed the entire lawn, did some much needed trimming of low hanging branches on some tress in the yard and planted flowers in four planters.  All together it was about 3 hours of outdoor work.  After a quick shower I was off to the YMCA for a short workout since I felt I had already sweated off a couple of pounds from the yard work.  Short workout and the sauna later and I was off for a late lunch and then home just in time before the evening showers began.  I'm still nursing an upper groin strain which happened during the Relay for Life event at the end of May so I'm having to take it slow on the treadmill lately.  Only a little bit of running and more moderate paced walk rather than my preferred speed walking.  The calories burn off slower but the pain is less.  Hopefully if I take it easy with that over the next month or so, I can build back up to more running.  As of this morning I have lost 31 pounds since I began going to the YMCA along with my change in eating habits.  I am so looking forward to the day I hit my goal weight.  I will celebrate with a Big Mac and fries!  I know the weight comes off quicker at first so I anticipate it will be at least 2 more months before I am at the point that I'm shooting for.  One I get there, then I will start splitting my workout more evenly between cardio and weights.  If I can just get the waist down 2 more pants sizes (I'm already down 2 sizes since I began).

My home away from home, the YMCA at Lakewood

Today was a good day.  I woke up before the alarm went off so I had extra time to shower, dress and have my morning coffee before church at PGUMC.  Wonderful sermon as always, but the highlight of my day was getting to see Kaitlan and Paxton at church.  I did not see them before the service but once I spotted Paxton up front with Jay during the children's time, I knew I had to find Kaitlan afterward.  Not sure what it is, but I just feel such a connection.  Maybe it's because even though circumstances are extremely different, I relate to some of her emotions right now.  It's also that I know from things that Joe said to me that I know she was someone very dear to him.  We would always pass by their house when we were returning to church after breakfast at McDonald's in between the 8:30 and 11:00am services.  Occasionally we would see Brian outside in the yard and Joe would enevitably say something to the effect, "I wish Kaitlan was still singing in the choir.  I always enjoyed being around her".  Now Joe never had anything bad to say about any choir member and was always positive about them all. (Unless it was I wish I had stronger sopranos, altos, tenors, basses....whatever he was in short supply of at any particular time).  But I didn't hear him say he missed someone or enjoyed a past choir member very often.  That alone let me know that she had a little something extra built in to her personality and attitude.  Had Joe still been alive when Paxton was diagnosed I know that he would have been so profoundly affected.  One because everyone reacts strongly to a ill child, but even more so because i know how much he thought of Kaitlan and of Brian too for all the help he offered with sound during special performances.  It's only since Joe's death and Paxton's illness that I've had the opportunity to get to know her better and it's been very easy.  For me there is a connection.  Not one that I can adequately find words for.  My heart aches for their family and when I see her smile, I imagine choir rehearsals and Joe looking at that same smile.  It seems like each time we see each other there are tears.  However, I have learned that tears are never a bad thing.  If you feel them rising up, let them surface, give in.   You will feel better, if only for a little while.

This coming weekend is going to be a very special one for me.  First, I will get to see Joe's sister Bettie and my niece and nephew, Brittany & Joshua during the day on Saturday.  Also on Saturday, Rob & Lola will be coming into town to stay with me for a couple of days.  That visit is sure to illicit some tears on my part, but I am also so incredibly sure that there will be smiles, laughter and plenty of Joe stories, including our wedding.  There are not two more special people in the world to me and I am so happy that they are visiting.  I'm sure with so much to look forward to next weekend, the week will drag by.  But I will do my best to fill each day (have to do some house cleaning) with work, workouts and anticipation.

I am blessed with so many people that continue to inquire about me and I am so grateful.  I'm also getting a lot of "skinny" comments, which I REALLY enjoy, but I'm not there yet, but I'm trying very hard.  Thank you for the kindness, prayers and good wishes.

1st Anniversary Weekend

First let me say, we had a blast!  With 82 people in our house on Saturday night for a little anniversay get-together it is hard not too.  The food was a hit, the cakes were a hit, the pineapple punch was a hit and the champagne punch was a big hit!  The best part however was the people though.  The smiles, the laughter and the conversation were the best ingredient for the night.  Rob Hugh & Lola Elliott Hugh were down from Connecticut and brought us a copy of the video that Lola had made from the wedding, the rehearsal and the trip to East Hadem afterward to the Bishopsgate Inn & Goodspeed Opera House.  The video played almost constantly throughout the evening and those that were interested sat and watched.  As the evening drew to a close, we were able to get some photos taken.  However, there were three cameras going at one time and no one was sure where to look.  But we laughed and had a great time.

Eventually we had to put signs up indicating which punch was the champagne punch and which was the alcohol free. 

We had 2 cakes but only put them out one at a time.  Once this one was done then the one with the rainbow rather than the baloons came out.  There wasn't an opportunity to take a photo of that one since it was only on the table about 2 seconds before being cut.  Eveyone loved the cake!

Lola was able to snap one photo of me and Joe in front of the cake just as the first guests began to arrive.  Once they started, it seemed like the floodgates opened.  It was great!

Of course we had flowers every where that we could.  Living room, kitchen and family room.

Of course, we had to have lots of roses as they are mine and Joe's favorite flowers.

As the party began to wind down, the camera's came out and we were smiling left, right and center.

Part of the gang at the end.

And a little more of the gang!  Back row: Lara Wood, Rob Hugh, Tracy Morris, Lola Elliott Hugh, Jeff Whicker, Kenny Hill, Artie Cline, Mike Heath.  Front row: Ethan Wood, Joe Lupton, Jeff Holland, Jill Boliek, Mark Boliek

The celebration wasn't complete until church on Sunday.  Joe and I had supplied the flowers for the Altar at PGUMC Sunday and were thrilled with the way it was presented in the bulletin.

And then the flowers themselves.  The florist did a wonderful job.

It's hard to get a shot together when you are basically alone at the church at 7:30am on Sunday morning so we had to split it up.  Maybe I'll try some Photoshop magic and put them together!

It was an exceptionally wonderful weekend.  Made so by our friends who came out in to help us celebrate.  We are especially glad that Rob & Lola were able to make the trip down.  Our 1st anniversary would have been missing an integral part had they not been here.  Lola even acquired a large number of new Facebook friends as a result of their trip!

Thank you to everyone who has expressed their best wishes on our anniversary, especially those at PGUMC who took the time when they saw the bulletin to come up to one or both of us and congratulate us.  You made the weekend complete for us.